Tongues
by Vasuki
Summary: What if Naruto shared common ancestry with a certain bloodline from stone? See how things work out for Naruto when he manifests the most explosive bloodline around. NarutoxFemale HIATUS/DISCONTINUED
1. Chapter 1

Well here goes, my third attempt at a fanfic, and the first one to actually make it online, I've got a good feeling!

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"Get up brat!" Was the morning greeting Naruto was used to receiving in the orphanage. What he wasn't used to was the person yelling it at him to actually be in his room. Usually they just yelled through the door and left.

It was with a yawn that the newly six year old Naruto replied, trying in vain to rub some alertness into his eyes as he sat up. It wasn't likely to be a good thing that the old woman had taken the effort to actually enter his room to wake him. Rifling through his sleepy mind, Naruto tried to remember anything he may have done recently that would have gotten him in trouble, but came up blank.

"Don't just lay in bed you idiot! Get up! Today's a very special day you know." The matron said with a smile. This set Naruto on guard. The workers at the orphanage never smiled at him. Naruto pondered what was so special about today for a second before it hit him. Today was October tenth, his birthday, and anniversary of the Kyuubi's defeat. His suspicion forgotten, Naruto couldn't help but get excited. He had seen the parties the other kids got on their birthdays, and while he himself had never gotten one, he had been hoping for one every day as his birthday grew nearer, and now it seemed he was finally getting his wish! Naruto broke into a grin as he hopped out of bed and started getting dressed, the matron stepping out of his room unnoticed with a sneer.

"Come downstairs once you're ready, and bring all your things, to celebrate this special day you'll be getting a new room. You're a little...old for this one." Said the middle-aged woman, smiling another one of those strange smiles. But Naruto was too ecstatic to notice. A new room! He didn't think this day could get any better.

Naruto could hear the matron walking down the stairs as he packed all of his clothes and the few other things he owned into his duffle bag before rushing downstairs, almost tripping down the steps in his anticipation. He stopped upon reaching the main foyer of the orphanage, surprised by the presence of the Sandaime Hokage. His grin returned full force as he jumped to hug the man around the legs.

"Oji-san! Did you come to celebrate my birthday with me?" Asked Naruto as he grinned up at the grandfatherly Sarutobi. That's when Naruto realized that the Sandaime was frowning, and his grin started to slide off his face, something wasn't right. It was then that he noticed every worker in the orphanage was in the room, each with smirks or triumphant smiles on their faces.

The Sandaime noticed Naruto's fading grin and wandering eyes and replaced his frown with a sad smile.

"I'm afraid that I don't have the time Naruto-kun, I'm sorry. I'm here to take you to your new home." Sarutobi could see the confusion in the boy's eyes as he turned to point at the matron.

"She said I'd be getting a new room! What do you mean new home?" The boy's voice was raised and it was obvious that he was beginning to get upset. The matron just sneered down at him.

"You'll be getting a new room brat, don't worry, but I never said anything about it being here." This garnered a few snickers from the other people in the room, but they were all silenced with a sharp glare from the Hokage.

"Come on Naruto, it's time we were going, I have plenty to do today with the annual festival and we have a decent walk ahead of us to reach your new apartment." Said Sarutobi with a kind smile. Naruto was on the brink of crying and after giving a final a glare at the orphanage staff he stormed out ahead of the Hokage and ran off into the forest, tears finally falling from his eyes.

As the Hokage followed at a more sedated pace, the matron of the orphanage let out a sigh of relief. She was finally free! No more having to feed and care for that wretched boy a minute longer. She cared for all the children under her care, but that was one boy she could never bring herself not to hate.

"Finally, I can enjoy my job again." With that the matron turned and ushered her employees to start waking the children for breakfast.

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The Hokage managed to find Naruto easily enough. A few minutes after leaving the orphanage he found him leaning against a tree, sobbing into the duffle bag caught in his knees he held tightly to his chest. The withered old ninja slowly made his way to Naruto, and kneeled down to be at eye level with the boy before placing a comforting hand on his head. The boy seemed to freeze for a moment and looked up, upon realizing who it was he immediately threw himself at the withered old Hokage and began to sob even harder than before.

The old man could do no more than hold the boy and rub his back while he released his sadness. It pained Sarutobi to know that the boy's burden would be with him for the rest of his life, and he damned the fates that would place it with a child as pure as Naruto. He knew that this was the only option, but it still caused his heart to ache every time he saw a villager glare at Naruto as he passed. He could only hope that Naruto would be strong until he could find someone who accepted him.

It was nearly a half an hour until the boy finally managed to stop crying, he simply lay limp in Sarutobi's arms, staring at nothing, until he finally spoke in so quiet a voice the old Hokage nearly missed it.

"Why doesn't anyone want me?"

The old man simply sighed, and grasped the boy's shoulders and helped him stand so he could speak to him face to face. He was going to have to comfort him without the truth, and he didn't like it one bit. He wished he could tell the boy, he really did, but he wouldn't be able to handle it. There's no telling what the boy would do. So he braced himself and let out the speech he had spent years going over in his head.

"Humans are difficult creatures to understand Naruto. They can fret for weeks over one mean thing they said to a friend, or kill dozens with no remorse. People don't see you like I do Naruto. They don't see the kind and energetic boy who wants to enjoy life and make friends. I can promise you though, some time, somewhere, you will find people who accept you. People who will enjoy your companionship and trust. You'll have family and friends one day Naruto. Simply be yourself, and one day, without even realizing it, they'll be there for you."

Naruto looked up at the wise old man with a look akin to awe.

"You really mean it? A family... but no one will ever adopt me..." Naruto said, the hope in his eyes dimmed by the thought. Every time prospective parents would come the orphanage they'd either glare at him or just plain ignore him while they talked and played with the other kids. It just wasn't fair.

"Family is more than just legal rights or blood. I've seen orphans adopted into families and then simply leave at the first opportunity, never to return. Are they more of a family than a group of friends that have been together for years? Anyone can be family Naruto-kun, it just takes time to find the right people."

Naruto simply stared at Sarutobi for a minute after he finished talking, deep in thought. Slowly, a determined look began to creep across the boy's face, until finally he thrust his fist into the air.

"You're right Oji-san! I don't need parents! I'll make a ton of friends and we'll be a family that way!"

The Hokage laughed at the boy's sudden enthusiasm. If Naruto was anything, he was determined. This also presented an ideal opportunity for Sarutobi to talk to the boy about something he'd been meaning to discuss with him soon.

"I think I might have a good idea on where to meet those friends Naruto, how would you like to join the ninja academy?"

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**Two years later**

Naruto was leaning back in his chair at the back of the room, absentmindedly scratching his palm while he stared at the ceiling. This was his second year at the ninja academy and he was regretting ever agreeing to this. This wasn't the first time. The taijutsu training, weapons practice, and learning jutsu were cool, but that was only half of the program. The other half was theory, history, math, and reading, and was about as interesting to Naruto as a box of rocks.

Naruto was taking a moment to ponder his classmates. He'd been doing this a lot recently, ever since he and Kiba had become friends a few months back after running into each other trying to skip class.

Naruto's eyes fell first upon a black haired boy a few rows towards the front, Uchiha Sasuke. The kid used to be alright, but a few months back his entire clan had been massacred by his revered older brother Itachi. He'd been a lot moodier ever since and the only people willing to risk ticking him off were fangirls trying to score points with sympathy. Suffice to say, it hadn't worked out well for any of them. On either side of Sasuke were Yamanaka Ino and Haruno Sakura, both at the top of Sasuke's fangirl list and both paying rapt attention to Iruka. The chewing out Sasuke had given them would probably last until lunch, and then they'd be right back at it.

To Naruto's right sat Inuzuka Kiba, the blonde's new partner in crime. His friend wasn't going to be much help at the moment though, as the feral looking boy seemed to be enjoying a nice nap. Naruto smirked as he watched one of the boys ears twitch. The first time he'd realized they did that he'd made of the boy non-stop until he punched Naruto square in the face. Kiba had won the ensuing scuffle, and Naruto had been forced to never mention it again.

That was something Naruto hadn't been expecting from his first friendship. Every time they got into an argument they would just fight it out. Whoever won, the fight would end with both ninja trainees laughing and they'd go about their day as if it had never happened. It struck Naruto as a little weird, but he was happy with it, so he let it go. It was actually kind of fitting considering how they had become friends.

_Flashback:_

_Lunch was almost over, and the rest of the day was just going to be that boring book crap. Naruto didn't need to stick around for that. So using his unconquerable genius, the blonde set up a bag of smoke-bombs to go off when someone tripped a trip-wire. Trip they did, as not two minutes later some poor kid walked right into it and fell flat on his face, triggering the giant smokescreen. As the chuunin instructor on lunch duty rushed to see what was going on, Naruto made a break for it._

_Only to collide headfirst into Inuzuka Kiba with a shout._

_"What the hell?! Watch where you're going dog-boy!"_

_"Me? You'd better get out of my way dobe!"_

_The ensuing brawl lasted twenty-five minutes and ended with both boys lying bruised and beaten on the ground, laughing their asses off. _

_"Not bad loser."_

_"You're not terrible either dog-breath."_

They ended up bonding over the week they spent after hours cleaning the academy as punishment for skipping class, a mutual dislike of "pointless" classes and Sasuke's fangirls went a long way to forging a friendship.

The rest of the class wasn't nearly as loud or attention grabbing as the first four, so Naruto didn't know as much about the rest of them. The Akimichi boy ate constantly, Nara Shikimaru was the laziest person Naruto had ever seen, and it was a pain to get paired up with Hyuuga Hinata. The girl was nice, but whenever the two would spar, Naruto was a bundle of nerves. This was because no matter who won, Hinata would seem upset. If Naruto won, she would ask if he was ok and apologize for beating him, if Naruto won, she would stare at the ground and not talk for a long while. It completely confused the young blonde.

Naruto was torn from his thoughts by a burning sensation from his palms. They'd been coming and going with more and more frequency for the past year. The school nurse passed it off as growth pains, but Naruto hadn't grown all the much in the past year, and the increased time he spent favoring his hands was starting to make him a little nervous.

A few minutes passed, and the pain subsided, Naruto letting out a sigh of relief. After lunch was shuriken practice, and there'd be no way for him to focus if his hands were burning. Naruto spared a moment to tune back into Iruka, hearing something about a guy funding construction back in the time of the shodaime Naruto tuned him back out again. All of this history crap was pointless, they were ninjas, not librarians! This line of thought was cut off as his hands began to act up again, itching, and then burning, but for the first time, they weren't stopping there. It wasn't too long before Naruto felt like his hands were being torn up from the inside, and he couldn't help but grip his desk and let out a yelp of pain.

Naruto didn't like to be the center of attention until he was ready. If he wasn't ready to be the center of attention, then it meant that he had probably been caught setting up a prank that no one would like him for. This also meant trouble for Naruto, so when the entire class turned to see what he was yelping about, he got a little nervous.

"Naruto, you ok man?"

Kiba had woken up after hearing Naruto's cry of pain to see him gripping his desk with white knuckles. Naruto managed a feeble grin in Kiba's direction, before turning to face Iruka when he realized he was asking him a question.

"Naruto, are you all right?"

The teacher had been a lot kinder to Naruto this year, the first year under him Naruto could plainly see hatred in the man's eyes, but at some point, that hatred had turned to concern.

"I don't know Iruka-sensei, my hands really hurt, like something's ripping them from the inside..."

Iruka could see Naruto was sweaty and pale from all the way in the front of the room, and decided to cut the end of the morning short.

"Ok everyone, we're heading to lunch ten minutes early today, be back in here by the usual time. Naruto, come with me, I'll take you to see the nurse."

As everyone emptied out of the room Naruto felt someone sling his arm over their shoulder and lift him up. Naruto turned in surprise to see Kiba grinning at him in that toothy way of his.

"Come on blondie, let's get you to the nurse."

Naruto could only smile. He'd finally found a good friend.

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Naruto was sitting on an examination table in the hospital. Upon reaching the academy nurse's office all the nurse could figure out was that something was in fact wrong with his hands, and recommended he go the hospital to have them take a better look at it. The sensation of tearing flesh had subsided to be replaced with a dull throb about the time he'd arrived at the hospital.

So far he'd been there for two hours, and gone through four doctors, eight hand massages, two needles, and enough disgruntled muttering to put him off human contact for a month. The doctor currently man-handling his hand finished his examination and stood up with a groan as a nurse brought in the results from whatever tests they'd run his tissue samples through.

Naruto's former nervousness had developed into a full-blown paranoia by this point. He'd really gotten into the idea of being a shinobi over the past two years, and any serious problems with his hands could throw a wrench in that plan. Not only would his dream go down the tubes, if he got booted out of the ninja program, his stipend would cease once he turned ten, and he'd have to find civilian work, an unlikely prospect, considering the villages general disdain of him. As a shinobi he would be at least partially funded by the government until he reached chuunin rank.

The doctor dismissed the nurse and set down the clipboard before turning to Naruto.

"Well, from what I can tell there is definitely something going on with your hands. I honestly can't say I have any idea what though. There's an empty space in each of your palms with a bunch of tissue at the center, like a tendril of some kind. There are also a number of solid fragments embedded in the flesh along the cavities. Can you recall anything that may have caused this? A previous injury, a weird feeling after a jutsu? Anything could help us here."

Naruto shook his head.

"No, for the past year my hands have just been itching from time to time, I didn't think much of it until today."

The doctor nodded and frowned at this before stepping out of the room for a few minutes, leaving Naruto to his thoughts. Having a room on the corner of two hallways provided a little entertainment while he waited, listening to doctors tell nurses what this patient needed and nurses telling interns what they were doing wrong. It was honestly kind of interesting to listen to the workings of the hospital staff until a particularly unsettling conversation from a pair of passing nurses met his ears.

"Wait, let's go out the side exit. That Uzumaki brat's in exam room twelve, I'd rather go around."

"You really don't like him do you? I guess it's to be expected..."

As the voices of the nurses faded away Naruto was left in a far more sullen mood than before. It wasn't the first time he'd overheard people talking about him like that, it was just the way his life was, people either didn't like him or they ignored him. When he thought back on it, he'd never gotten a straight answer from anyone on why that was, even the old man would get evasive when he asked.

Naruto was surprised when the doctor walked back in followed by the Hokage. Had he really been sitting here long enough for them to get the Hokage? He hopped down from the examination table with a smile to greet the old man.

"Hey Oji-san! Do you know what's going on? 'Cause I'm really getting bored just sitting around this room."

Sarutobi responded with a chuckle, the boy was always so energetic, that was probably why his grades from the academy weren't what he was hoping them to be.

"Hello Naruto-kun. The doctor has told me all about your strange condition and I think I might have an idea. Let me take a look at your hands."

Once again Naruto was forced to sit through a thorough examination of his palms, though the Hokage seemed to be paying attention more to the lines on his palm then the feeling of his hand. Finally, the Hokage pulled his hands away with a thoughtful hum.

"Naruto, come to my office first thing tomorrow morning, I want to test my theory. Don't worry about missing school, I'll write you an excuse this once."

"Sure thing Oji-san! So does this mean I can go?"

The doctor looked at the both of them and shrugged. He didn't have anything left to do, if the Hokage thought he knew what was going on, he could handle it. Truthfully the doctor was a little unnerved with how casual the Hokage and the village pariah were together.

"Yeah, he can go, we're done here. I'll send the bill to the usual place."

Naruto let out a yip and bolted for the door. Sarutobi frowned, whenever Naruto made a hospital visit the bill always turned out a little higher than was expected. The invoices would cite administering extra tests and precautionary treatments that Naruto could never seem to recall, but without evidence there was nothing the Hokage could do. So he simply followed the hyper blonde out and made his way back to the Hokage tower, he needed a smoke.

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Naruto arrived early at the Hokage's tower the next day, looking haggard. The pain had woke him up around two in the morning and he hadn't been able to get back to sleep, and now there was an angry looking red line across each of his palms, and his hands themselves had begun to feel odd, like there was something moving inside of them.

The receptionist didn't seem much better off than Naruto at the moment. She looked she'd slept at the office that night, and tucked under her desk was a bedroll, indicating that she had in fact spent the night. She had stormed out of her boyfriend's apartment after catching him cheating on her, and had spent most of the night crying. But no one checks under her desk, and no one really pays much attention to the woes of the Hokage's receptionist, so Naruto didn't know any of this as she waved him into the Hokage's office.

Naruto stepped in past the ever-present ANBU guard to see Sarutobi smoking his pipe and rooting through a jar on his desk that was filled clay. The young blonde couldn't help but wonder why the hell the Sandaime had a jar of clay on his desk.

"'Morning Oji-san, what's with the clay?"

The Hokage smirked as he heard him mention the clay.

"This clay is specially purified and supplemented with chakra, and this is going to be what proves to me whether or not my hunch is right. Let me see your hands again."

Naruto obliged, and the old man nodded his head after running a finger across the red line on his left palm.

"Yes, this is just further evidence, you're almost done if this is what I think it is. Well, no use waiting, Naruto, I want you to grab a handful of this clay."

Naruto simply looked at the Hokage with a quirked eyebrow before stepping up to his desk to grab a handful of the clay. The moment his hand touched the clay, Naruto's hand erupted in pain. It was the most agonizing thing the boy had ever felt. Screaming and wrenching his hand away he looked down at his palm to see that where the red line had been before there was now a small opening in his hand! The hole seemed to be twitching and writhing, trying to open itself wider, and it sent spasms of pain though Naruto's arm until finally it stopped, sealing itself up again, leaving nothing but the red line from before. The blonde collapsed to the ground as the pain passed, panting.

"So I was right."

Putting a lid on the jar of clay, Sarutobi walked over to help the boy to his feet, offering him a kind smile and getting a weak grin in return. After a few minutes Naruto was able to catch his breath and asked the question that the Hokage was waiting for.

"What the hell was that?!"

Sarutobi frowned.

"Language, Naruto."

Seeing Naruto just throw him a dirty look, the old man chuckled and launched into his explanation.

"It would appear that you've come into the Kuchisaki bloodline limit."

Naruto simply stared at the Hokage for a minute, then two. The old man was considering poking him to see if he was ok before he suddenly burst into an explosive rant.

"YES! A bloodline ability! This is awesome! I'll totally be able to whip everybody's butts now! They'll never know what hit em! What does it do Oji-san? By the way, Kuchisaki? What kind of a name is that for a bloodline? What about..."

Naruto's abrupt end to his rant had Sarutobi a little concerned, from the look on the boy's face he could tell what was coming, and he was right.

"Does this mean we can find out who my parent were?"

The Hokage sighed, and gestured for the boy to take a seat on the couch against the wall. Rubbing his temple with his thumb and forefinger, the old man began to tell Naruto exactly what he knew the boy wouldn't want to hear.

"Naruto, the only other place this bloodline is known to exist is a small clan in Iwagakure. You were born eight years ago, this was around the time that the last great ninja war was coming to an end. Iwa was our primary enemy during that war, and both of our villages killed plenty of ninjas from the other. There was and still is a lot of animosity between our villages. For you to have this bloodline, it's likely that your mother was a victim of rape by an Iwa shinobi. It's possible that you simply lucked out and share a common ancestor with the Iwa strain, but this is most likely what happened."

Naruto simply stayed silent, staring at the old man with an intent gaze. The question the old man got in response was definitely not the one he had been expecting.

"What's rape?"

The old Hokage only now realized the trap that he'd dug himself into. He'd forgotten that without parents, the boy would have had no one to explain the birds and the bees to him. So now in addition to revealing possibly traumatizing information about the boys origins, he would have to give him a crash course in sex ed as well.

Some days it just didn't pay to be Hokage.

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"That's just creepy."

Kiba and Naruto were sitting by a stream in a training area near the academy, while Akamaru was chasing a butterfly around the clearing.

"That's what I thought at first too, but now that I've got the hang of it the sky's the limit for what I can do with it!"

Naruto was showing Kiba the now fully manifested Kuchisaki. Resting in each of his palms were two human mouths. He could open and shut them at will, and while shut it was impossible to tell his palms apart from anyone else's. It had taken another week of pain and a few weeks of stretching and practice to finally get the mouths to where they could start to be used the way they were meant to be.

"Now stand back Kiba. I'm gonna blow up that huge boulder over there!"

As he spoke, Naruto pointed over to a rock about the size of a small house. Kiba scoffed.

"You wish, if you can blow that thing up with just clay I'll do your homework for a week!"

Never one to turn down a challenge, Naruto responded with an appropriate amount of confidence.

"You're on! I'll shape this clay into a bird and send it and that rock flying through the air. Sharpen your pencil Kiba-sempai, I hope you'll enjoy your extra study time!"

"Please, this next week will be nothing but relaxation while you slave over my work, and I expect you to do it well too!"

With the challenge successfully met, Naruto leaned down and scooped up a handful of clay from the bank, and paused. He just knew that this was going to feel weird. Then he took the plunge, and had his right hand eat it.

It was an odd feeling to be sure, consciously chewing something without tasting it or being able to swallow. He did as the Hokage instructed him and began to channel his chakra into the mouth, trying to concentrate on the form of a bird in his mind while his teeth and tongue shaped the clay. Feeling that it was ready, Naruto spat the clay back out. It only took Kiba a second to react.

"Bwahahaha! What the hell is that?! Some kind of retarded squirrel?!"

Looking down, Naruto was disappointed to note that the clay did in fact look more like a retarded squirrel than the bird he'd been aiming for. He could kind of see the crease where the wings were supposed to be, and the tail almost looked like it had a feather pattern. He hadn't the faintest idea what had happened to the head though, it looked like a damn pumpkin!

"Sh-Shut up Kiba! I just need to practice a little, that's all."

With that, Naruto tossed the squirrel-bird-pumpkin over his shoulder before bending down to scoop another handful of clay, but the moment his strange hybrid hit the ground, the sound of an explosion and the feeling of being launched into a stream of icy cold water was all that Naruto could perceive.

Surfacing quickly and coughing up the water that he'd inhaled, the blonde swam back to shore to see what had happened, and had to stifle a laugh. There was a good meter wide crater where he'd tossed the clay bomb, and about fifteen meters away hanging upside down out of a tree was Kiba, his jacket covered in soot and Akamaru trying to jump up to reach him. Once the humor of the situation had subsided, Naruto realized one of his mistakes.

"Ah, I see what happened, I forgot to focus on how to detonate it, so it just went boom once it hit the ground. Ok, let's try again!"

The speed at which Kiba managed to extricate himself from the tree and run would make Naruto jealous for months to come.

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"Damn it!"

Naruto was ridiculously frustrated. No matter how hard he tried, he just couldn't get the damn clay to form properly. Configuring how to detonate it was easy, but for the life of him the young lad just couldn't manage the chakra control necessary to pull off a reasonable sculpture. Every now and then he'd get a good bird or a perfect squirrel, but then he wouldn't be able to control them properly. He'd even lost one of the birds when it flew off, apparently on its own! Naruto just hoped it didn't hurt anybody.

He'd spent three damn months coming back to this spot by the stream, again and again trying to get his skill with the Kuchisaki up to par. He'd also spent a lot of time thinking about what the Hokage had said about his parents, how his father had probably forced himself on his mother and she had abandoned him or given him up for one reason or another. It made him nauseous to think about it, how he was the result of something so... violating.

So engrossed was Naruto in his thoughts and training that he didn't even notice Hinata watching him from behind a tree. She had been worried about him ever since that day he'd left class in pain, but hadn't been able to work up the courage to approach him at the academy. He'd always disappear at the end of the day as well, and this was the first time she'd managed to follow him all the way to his training ground.

She wanted to talk to him, and to see how he was, but she was just so nervous, what if he didn't want to talk to her? What if he was angry that she followed him? So caught up in her doubts, she didn't see the mutant squirrel made of clay hobble up the opposite side of the tree she was hiding behind, so when an explosion sounded directly above her head, she shrieked in surprise and dove to the side.

"Hinata? Are you ok?! What were you doing back there?"

Naruto had seen her, and rushed over to see if she was ok. Hinata looked up to stare directly into his eyes, and promptly fainted.

This was a situation Naruto wasn't familiar with. So he did what all young boys do when they think they may have hurt someone.

He panicked.

* * *

A/N: 

Well, that's one chapter done. Please, leave a review, constructive criticism's greatly appreciated. And no, this isn't a naruxhina or naruxsaku. That's the only hint you're getting though!


	2. Chapter 2

Here's chapter two, big thanks to everyone who reviewed/faved/alerted!

On the topic of disclaimers. If someone from some big publishing company is trolling through thousands of fanfictions each day to find someone without one so they can sue, I'll be glad to get sued, just so I can laugh at them in court. It's a fanfiction website. If there's a story on a fanfiction website, that it couldn't POSSIBLY mean that it's fanfiction, could it?

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Naruto breathed a sigh of relief as he watched Hinata begin to stir back to consciousness. She'd only been out for about ten minutes, but he'd still been immensely worried since the moment she hit the ground. He'd immediately thought his squirrel bomb had hurt her, but after checking her over and not finding any injuries, he'd resigned himself to simply sitting around and waiting for her to wake-up.

To see her wake up was a huge relief for the blonde, because he knew that if he had been forced to bring her to someone for help, he would have been blamed for somehow hurting her. Considering that she was the heiress to the Hyuuga clan, that was the last thing Naruto needed.

Naruto watched as her eyes fluttered open, only to squeeze shut again as sunlight poured in. "You okay Hinata? I didn't hurt you did I?"

Hinata blinked the spots out of her eyes and sat up with a blush. She knew she'd fainted when he surprised her. She was ashamed by how easily that could happen to her, it was just another weakness for her father to criticize. For it to happen after following Naruto all this way was even more embarrassing.

"Yes, I'm f-fine Naruto-kun, you just startled me is all..." Said Hinata, her eyes on the ground in front of her.

Moving to stand she swayed dangerously and was about to fall before a hand reached out and steadied her. Hinata simply stared at the ground harder as her blush grew.

"Whoa, are you sure you're ok?" Came the concerned voice of Naruto. He began to think that maybe he really should take her to the hospital.

"I'll be fine, I just need a m-minute or two..." Hinata began to press the tips of her two index fingers together in her age old nervous habit. It had its purpose though; the repetitive physical motion calmed her down a little and allowed her to think a bit more clearly when she was nervous. As her thoughts caught up with her, Hinata suddenly remembered what had caused her to dive from her hiding place in the first place.

"Umm...Naruto, what was that explosion?" This question caused Naruto to pause for a moment. The old man had said not to tell anyone but people he was sure he could trust about his bloodline. Hinata didn't really seem like such a bad person though. What harm could it do to tell her? Nodding as if to confirm his own decision, the blonde looked around for eavesdroppers before continuing.

"If I tell you, you have to promise not to tell anyone else! It's a secret, alright?" Hinata was surprised at this. Naruto was willing to share a secret with her, a girl he barely knew! She kept her head low so he wouldn't see her blush come back as she nodded. She was getting very curious as to what he was about to share.

"That explosion was from a squirrel I made using my bloodline!" Exclaimed Naruto, at a volume that seemed to render the need for secrecy null.

Coming from a family with a heritage vested in its bloodline limit, and a reputation for its members to keep their cool in the harshest of the circumstances, the response Hinata gave didn't seem to really match up when confronted with this shocking bit of knowledge.

"You have a bloodline limit...that makes s-squirrels?" The utter confusion present in the young Hyuuga's voice was obvious enough that even Naruto could pick up on it, and he smacked himself for wording his response so poorly.

"No, that's not it! Well it is sort of... gah, wait, let me try this again..." So Naruto went back to the beginning and told Hinata the whole story. From when his hands first started to bother him all the way up to his present predicament with his inability to properly shape and control his creations. "It's so annoying! I understand the whole visualization thing, but no matter how much I focus I just can't get it to come out right!"

Due to the nature of the training all members of the Hyuuga clan underwent, Hinata could readily tell that the problem was probably in the boy's chakra control. "What did Hokage-sama say to do with your chakra N-Naruto-kun?"

Naruto's faced scrunched up in thought. He stayed that way for a while, and with each passing minute it became more and more apparent to Hinata that Naruto hadn't been paying any attention at all to the way he was using his chakra. Any mismanagement of chakra could be dangerous, and with the fact that whatever he was doing caused explosions, the young Hyuuga was very worried. She was finally able to let out a sigh of relief when a flash of triumph crossed the boys face.

"Ah! Now I remember! The old man said in order to create things with the Kuchisaki I first have to have a clear picture of what I want in my head, and then feed a steady stream of chakra into my hand while it forms." Naruto paused for a moment with a thoughtful look on his face, as if re-assimilating the knowledge he'd just spouted. "That must be it, I haven't really been paying attention to my chakra while training, maybe now I can make it work!" Naruto rushed over to the riverbank and spent a moment looking around before finding a suitable amount of clay and scooping it into his hand. Before he had the Kuchisaki ingest it however, he turned back to Hinata.

"Hey Hinata, could you use your Bya...Bai...umm...doujutsu to see if I'm doing it right?" Asked Naruto, failing to recall the name of her bloodline limit. It didn't seem to bother Hinata, who blushed at being asked to help and just nodded, before making the long chain of seals necessary to activate her Byakugan. At first she was a bit surprised, he had a lot of chakra for someone their age, she didn't ponder this for very long though, as she watched in fascination as Naruto's hand swallowed the lump of clay whole and irregular bursts of chakra began to wash into it.

"Um...ok Naruto, you can start pumping the chakra evenly whenever you're ready." The response Hinata got was one that nearly caused her to fall over.

"Er, I already started."

Hinata was shocked. The boy thought that was a steady stream? His chakra control was downright awful! It was like the chakra just went as it pleased, sometimes a gushing torrent, other times a mere trickle. Chakra didn't naturally flow like that, so she at least knew he was trying, but this was just a whole new level of suck. Hinata shook her head a little to clear her thoughts, she'd never be sitting next to Kiba again, if she slipped into talking like that her father would be very upset. Turning her attention back to Naruto, she watched as something that vaguely resembled an eraser emerged from the maw in the blonde's hand.

"Crap!" Came the cry from the young boy. "I could have sworn I had it that time..." His voice turning despondent. Throwing the eraser-bomb at a rock Naruto made a half-ram seal only to see the bomb fizzle with a bit of smoke. The parallels to his actual life were not lost on Naruto, he thought he finally had it only for it to fail in both shape AND function.

"Naruto... Did you ever master the leaf exercise Iruka-sensei taught us?" Hinata had thought about it for a moment, and if she was right, it would explain a lot.

"What leaf exercise?" Bingo. Hinata thought that class had been quiet that day, it must have been another one of Naruto's "sick days". She walked over to the line of the trees away from the bank and grabbed two leaves from a low hanging branch, then turned and walked back, giving one leaf to Naruto and keeping the other for herself. Naruto simply stared at it like he had no idea what she had just handed him.

"This is the most basic chakra control exercise. You take a leaf and place it on your forehead, then release chakra from the area it's resting on to make it stick." Hinata paused to place her leaf on her brow, and after focusing for a moment, took her hand away. To Naruto's amazement, the leaf stayed. She shook her head to demonstrate how sturdy the connection was before continuing. "Too much chakra and it will blow away, too little and it'll just fall off. You also have to make sure you channel a steady amount of chakra, or you won't be able to keep the leaf stuck." As Hinata finished her explanation, she realized that Naruto was staring at her and nodding. She could feel her face heating up again, even when her father was upset with her he wouldn't focus his attention on her for this long. "Um...You can try now Naruto-kun..."

"Yosh! I'll definitely master this!" Yelled Naruto. If this would help him with his bombs, he would finish it as quickly as possible and move on to making bigger and better explosions! Naruto was giddy with anticipation as he pressed the leaf to his forehead and began to channel his chakra to his forehead. Once he felt he was prepared, the young shinobi in training began to release the chakra.

Almost at once he felt a burning sensation, Hinata hadn't said anything about this, but this was the first time he'd done something of this nature, so Naruto thought it was just part of the exercise and kept going. So focused on his task, he didn't even notice the shocked look on the young Hyuuga's face.

"Naruto-kun!"

"Huh?" Said the blonde as he was jerked from his concentration, removing his hand from his forehead. "What's up Hinata?" That's when Naruto realized that after removing his hand, the leaf hadn't fallen off of his head! "Hey Hinata! I did it!" Immediately forgetting that she was trying to tell him something he let out a cheer and began jumping around in excitement. If this exercise was that easy, he could fix his bombs in no time!

Hinata's voice eventually managed to break him out of his celebrations. "Naruto-kun, I think you need to use less chakra..."

"What? Why? I finished the exercise in one try!" Exclaimed Naruto. Hinata's response was simply to point at his forehead. Blinking twice in confusion, the boy reached up to feel the leaf, only to feel a bit of pain as he touched his skin. Pulling his fingers back to eye level, Naruto saw they were now covered in a fine dusting of ash.

"Crap." Was all Naruto could say. This was going to take longer than he'd thought.

----------

A man rubbed his eyes as he woke from his less than fit slumber. He'd just awoken from a nightmare, a memory of a war that he'd much rather have forgotten. He got out of bed without making a sound so as not to wake the women who shared his company this particular evening. He smiled a bit as he looked at them sleeping, he may have been getting older, but they still always needed a good night's rest after a round with the toad sannin!

He sat at the desk he'd been using for work during his stay at this particular house of ill repute. A pile of papers marked work on a half-completed story, and a bottle of sake marked a third of his inspiration. Seeing as the other two-thirds were still asleep, he took a swig and picked up a pen, determined to work on his notorious fiction until he could feel sleep grabbing at him once again. Even while the pen sat on the page however, it wouldn't move. The only thing that occupied the man's mind was his nightmare.

It had been years ago, during the war with Iwagakure. He had gone on an information gathering mission with a jounin he'd met after becoming an instructor. They'd ended up splitting up to cover the ground surrounding both sides of an enemy encampment faster, but his friend had never shown up on the other side. Going looking for him after a few minutes of tense waiting, all Jiraiya had found was a blood-smeared crater and a woman with tongues hanging out of her palms, sneering at him.

Luckily for Jiraiya, his perverted nature chose this moment to surface. Most high-level ninjas had some sort of defense mechanism against the psychological effects of what they'd seen and done, Jiraiya's was just more productive than most. Extra sets of tongues, the possibilities for that in his writing were phenomenal! Suddenly scribbling at a furious rate, Jiraiya paused in his creativity for just a moment.

"I'll be sure to dedicate this book to you my old friend..."

His lecherous giggles began to start up as page after page seemingly wrote themselves, he could feel it, this was going to be his best book yet!

----------

"Freak! Go back to stone where you belong! No one wants you here!" Naruto just sighed as he jogged away from his inebriated heckler. He knew it would just be a matter of time before the news of his bloodline got out into the public. Now not only was it no longer secret, but the villagers seemed to hate him even more than before, now that he was tied to Iwagakure by blood. Some old ninja who'd fought in the war must have seen him training and spread the news around the day Hinata helped him out, it was a generally shitty situation.

Before he had the Kuchisaki, most people were content to just ignore him aside from the occasional shopkeeper eager to try and rip him off. Now though, everyone seemed to be using it as an excuse to try and curse him off onto another village. He'd even been arrested under charges of being a spy! He was lucky the Hokage had heard of it when he did and sorted that out, or he might have been forced into an interrogation. He'd heard about ninja interrogations, and he was keen to avoid being on either end of one. His stomach probably couldn't take it.

Even Hinata was staying away from him. When Naruto had invited her to come and hang out with him while he trained his bloodline, she had seemed ecstatic, but the next day she never showed up, nor the day after that. When he confronted her after class on the third day, she'd quickly said that she had responsibilities to attend to at home and ran off. Kiba was keeping his distance as well. He'd shown up to class with a rather nasty bruise the day after the blonde had learned the leaf exercise. When Naruto asked how the Inuzuka had gotten hurt, he had simply said that his father was a dick and not to be offended if he didn't come to hang out for a while. When the energetic boy tried to push for more information, Kiba just punched him in the face. Naruto dropped it after that.

So he'd been spending the last few weeks this way, getting up, getting heckled on his way to class. Sleeping through class, and getting harassed on his way to training. Training, and getting chased on his way home. Even the progress he'd made since mastering the leaf exercise wasn't enough to lift his mood.

It was with a sigh that Naruto came to the door of his apartment. Living in the worst part of town as he did, graffiti wasn't a new experience to the boy. Naruto had even made his own artistic contributions from time to time. The blonde had never had to endure the targeted maliciousness of graffiti like this before. Every day it was something different, a picture of him stabbing the Hokage in the back, an image of him eating babies with his hands, and one that really got his blood boiling; a picture of a woman depicted as his mother leaving him in the garbage to go work at a whorehouse. Though there was one day when there was nothing there at all. In fact, on that day the hall had been cleaner then Naruto had ever seen it. The other tenants had been acting odd that day too, instead of harassing him, they seemed almost afraid him.

Today's graffiti was actually well done, indicating that an actual artist was behind it. The rather gruesome work depicted him as a twisted demon wearing a cruel sneer as he used his tongues to lap up the blood of a young girl. It was quickly making him nauseous, so Naruto tried to focus on his hands as he opened the door to his apartment and quickly slipped inside.

Naruto's apartment was small. There was a living room with an attached kitchen, a bathroom, and a bedroom with a small balcony for hanging laundry outside. Shutting the door behind him as he stepped into the living room, he lazily threw his school things into a corner before flopping onto a battered red couch with a sigh.

He was depressed. He'd gotten so used to having someone to hang out with that going a week alone was beginning to remind him of how things used to be. He knew it was their parent's faults, but that didn't make him any less lonely. Naruto was sick of this; no matter what he did he just couldn't catch a break. He'd spent his whole life hoping for people to like him, and the moment something good happened to him, that dream was knocked away like it never existed. Was this what Naruto's life was destined to be? One step forward, two steps back? Naruto was so engrossed in his own thoughts that when a brick that came crashing through his window, it didn't even register. A few minutes passed as Naruto brooded about his life before he slowly turned to look at the mess the brick had made. There amid the shards of the glass was the brick, a note wrapped around it as it lay in the sole patch of light shining through the window, allowing Naruto to just make out the one word written.

Die.

Naruto made a decision that night. He would no longer grovel for the acceptance of the villagers. If they didn't want him, tough shit. They had him, and he was going to be the best they had, so that no matter how much they hated him, the village would know that if he was gone, that would mean that they were weaker because of it. Naruto vowed to become one of the best shinobi the leaf had ever had, until the villagers were forced to acknowledge him.

----------

The kunai flew with deadly precision through the darkness, only to sink into a wall with no one in sight. The ANBU sighed, he was too high-strung, flinging kunai at flitting shadows was not a good sign. He thought it would probably be best if he just went to back to base and asked for a replacement for the rest of the night before he hurt someone he wasn't supposed to. He couldn't help it though, any ninja who drew security detail these days was a mess. Uzumaki hadn't pulled a prank in almost four months, and everyone was just waiting for something to explode. While the ANBU made his way back to ANBU headquarters musing whether or not Naruto was tormenting the minds of village security on purpose, a shadowy figure began to move towards the outer limits of the village.

He had been careless, that ANBU had almost caught him. He had what he came for though. Working on a tip from an informant, he'd checked on the boy and his potential. He'd watched him train, and while he was doing well, the boy's potential with his bloodline was limited. Naruto would never be able to become a true artist in the same vein as him. A shame.

Seeming to melt through the stone wall, he quickly made his way into the forest with practiced ease. The man smirked as he ran through the trees. The weak of body were meant to be weeded out so that only strength would remain to pass on to the next generation. The man came to his conclusion.

"I'll see if Itachi's willing to trade, at the very least I owe the boy the honor of disposing of him in the most artistic way possible." The man's smirk morphed into a malicious grin as he reached a hand into a pouch at his waste and began to chuckle under his breath.

----------

It had been almost a year since the public discovery of Naruto's bloodline. The constant hate had died down a bit after a few months. The graffiti and vandalism no longer happened, and people no longer glared as he went by unless he tried to talk with them. The hatred in their eyes would return full force then, as if by talking to them he was trying to force them to remember all the bad things that had ever happened in their life.

Kiba and Hinata had both explained their situations to Naruto, Kiba was on the receiving end of "realistic" training exercises whenever his parents found out he was hanging with Naruto. Meaning that he and one of his parents would fight each other full out, which meant Kiba was getting his ass kicked. Hinata wasn't as straightforward about it, she said that if her father heard she wasn't "devoting herself fully to her studies" then he would force her into remedial training. So if Naruto didn't want either of his friends to get beat down under the pretense of training, he had to stop bugging them outside of class.

This worked out well enough in regards to Kiba, since the two of them could joke around during class, but whenever they tried to include Hinata she would always come in looking haggard the next day. It seemed that while there wasn't anyone in their class to snitch on Kiba, Hinata wasn't so lucky.

Something both Kiba and Hinata had been amazed by was Naruto's progress. From what they could tell, the boy no longer planned out any pranks. He would still pull jokes and tricks on people, but they were always on the spot things when the opportunities presented themselves. There were no more days where everyone would find themselves glued to their seats, or all the teachers would come in with neon orange hair. Naruto wasn't even bottom of the class anymore. Now that he was actively training his chakra control and paying attention in class...well, to a degree... he seemed to be slowly making his way towards the middle of the rankings. The day Shikamaru had found out he was the new last place member of the class had been pretty funny. He'd simply looked at the grades, and then taken a nap. When asked how he could just sleep after learning that Naruto was beating him, he replied "I'll need the energy for when my mom finds out." and promptly passed back out on his desk.

Things were a bit less optimistic when it came to Naruto's training though. He'd hit a ceiling in his abilities with the Kuchisaki, something he really didn't expect to happen so soon. When he asked the Hokage, he'd simply replied that aside from making figures out of clay that could move independently, the only other thing he knew about was that he could somehow make specially refined clay that would work more effectively with his bloodline. That didn't mean the Hokage knew how. Other than that, the old man had simply encouraged Naruto to use his imagination and find new uses for his clay creatures, and to use his imagination far away from anything that didn't belong to him.

This lack of knowledge about his lineage is what brought Naruto into a newfound hobby that only a select few were pleased with. As if by fate, the day Naruto had learned there was nothing else the Hokage could tell him about his bloodline, the boy found a book. It was apparently a popular book, having its own display in the front of the one of the less reputable bookstores, but what had brought Naruto to buy the little orange book was the image on the cover. A seductive, flushed kunoichi leaning over and licking another blushing woman's cheek... with a tongue from her palm. The blonde immediately grabbed the book and left a stack of cash worth at least twice the book's value on the counter and ran off before the clerk had even fully registered he was there.

Making it to his regular training area Naruto hopped into a tree, and laying his back against the trunk, began to read...and read... and read. The boy had quickly realized that while... educational, the book had absolutely nothing that could help him. For some odd reason however, Naruto found that even after realizing this, he couldn't put the book down. For something he would have previously insulted someone fiercely for, the book had a surprisingly good plot.

----------

So the years passed by. People eventually realized that Naruto had finally grown out of epic-sized pranks, and a few small parties were held, especially among career janitors. Kiba and Hinata tried to hang out with Naruto whenever they felt they could get away with it, even though Hinata's face would magically turn into a giant tomato every time Naruto mentioned or read one of his new favorite books. Kiba on the other hand thought the books were awesome, but couldn't borrow them due to his mother, and according to Kiba, her "Freakishly painful steel boot." Kiba had never elaborated as to WHY his mother had a steel boot, but it was likely Kiba didn't even know.

Naruto's training came along well. His chakra control was up to par with where it should of been among his classmates, and once he'd gotten the hang of it, he'd come up with an almost sickening number of ideas for use with his bloodline. He was also well on his way to figuring out to make that special clay the Hokage had told him about. It was only a matter of time.

With Naruto taking his future as a shinobi of Konoha more seriously, he'd decided it was definitely time for a change of style. A baggy orange outfit that stuck out like a schoolgirl in a nursing home was not conducive to the ninja lifestyle. Having no sense of fashion whatsoever and being aware of his own deficiency in this area, Naruto eventually settled on just wearing the standard Konoha shinobi's uniform, though instead of dark green, black, or blue fabric, he wore a dark, burnt orange.

Today was finally the day of the genin exam. Almost half of the students that had originally been in Naruto's class were gone, dropped out or eliminated from the program throughout the years. Most first year classes at the academy filled about five classes, by the time graduation came around, there were usually only enough students left for two. Iruka looked over his class with pride as they sat, for once quietly, in suspense. Nervous for the coming exam. It was about time to start, and Iruka began to speak.

"As you all know, today is the day of your genin graduation exam. Before we start, I just want to tell each of you how proud I am. You guys are easily one of the most promising classes I've ever had the pleasure of teaching, and I expect you all to pass easily and become excellent shinobi and kunoichi in service of the village." Iruka turned with a smile towards Naruto as he said this, and the boy gave the chuunin a weak smile in return. Iruka had always rooted for him, and he'd always be thankful to the man for everything he'd done. Maybe once he had some money from missions he would come back and take the man out for ramen on him for once.

"You've all shown acceptable or exemplary talent in the fields of ninjutsu, taijutsu, and genjutsu. For your final exam, you must simply step into an examination room and prove that you're capable of performing the three basic academy ninjutsu, Kawarimi, Bunshin, and Henge. Succeed, and you will be awarded your leaf headband." Iruka had seen Naruto's cringe at bunshin, despite all of the boy's improvements, he still had trouble with pulling off a Bunshin jutsu. Iruka suspected it had something to do with the boy's burden, but there wasn't much he could do about it if that was the case. He was pulled from his thoughts by a hand waving from the third row trying to get his attention. "Hm? Yes Ino?"

Ino snorted as her Sensei finally came out of his daydream and acknowledged her, he could be so air-headed sometimes. "You mean all we have to do to pass after all this work is just do those three easy jutsu? What's up with that?"

Iruka actually just smiled at her and she realized the trap she'd fallen in to. He'd been hoping someone would ask that so he could squeeze in one more lecture, that bastard! "It's simple Ino. Those three jutsu represent three of the most important aspects of a ninja's life; escape, diversion, and subterfuge. By mastering these three jutsu, you're showing us that you're capable of engaging in those three staples of a ninja's with some degree of skill. Beyond that, there's nothing left to teach you here. The fact that you're still around for graduation proves that you're capable, anything else there is for you to learn can only be learned through experience. There would be no point in keeping you here."

A lot of students nodded sagely as Iruka finished his speech. Everything he said made sense, they were lucky to have a teacher like him. Naruto on the other hand had zoned out halfway through the speech and was re-reading his latest volume of Icha-Icha Paradise. Or he was until Iruka belted him in the eye with a piece of chalk. They both smirked at each other while Naruto rubbed the offended orb. That would be the last time Iruka got to throw classroom supplies at Naruto, he was glad it was a good shot.

So one by one Iruka called a name and brought them into the next room, while the rest of the class would wait in suspense, praying, practicing their hand seals, or sleeping, depending on their work ethic. It was almost an hour and a half later when Naruto realized it was just him, Sasuke, and Ino left in the room. The young blonde was having the time of his life watching the other blonde fish for encouragement from the ever-stoic Uchiha. In all his years in the academy since the Uchiha massacre, Naruto had never seen a single bit of evidence that Sasuke even had working hormones aside from the occasional growth spurt. As Iruka called Sasuke into the exam room, Naruto decided to give him one last parting shot.

"Good luck Sasuke, I'm sure once you get your forehead protector even the older girls will start to flock to you." Now this might be seen as a bit of a jealous comment, and in some ways it was, but Naruto got what he wanted. Sasuke was pale, he hadn't thought of that. Now he would have to deal with even MORE of these troublesome women. How dare Naruto ruin this for him! It was with a heavy heart that Sasuke walked into the exam room to meet his fate.

Naruto just snickered as he watched Sasuke go, only to realize that Ino was suddenly uncomfortably close to him. Looking over at the temperamental Yamanaka, he saw that she was on the verge of crying. This was something Naruto had no idea how to handle, as normally the process was: make a remark at Sasuke, Sasuke would retort, one of the two would leave, and then some of Sasuke's fangirls would come to hit him while the others would go to Sasuke's side to "comfort" him.

"You don't really think older women will be after Sasuke now do you Naruto? I can't compete with more developed bodies yet!" Ino was practically hysterical, and Naruto fell out of his chair as it clicked as to why she was so upset. Luckily for him, Iruka chose that moment to call him.

"Naruto, it's your turn for the exam... wait, what's wrong with..." Naruto quickly appeared at Iruka's side and began to push him out the door.

"No time for that sensei, let's go let's go!" Soon after, Naruto stood nervously before Iruka, Mizuki, and another chuunin from the other class seated behind a table covered in paperwork and leaf headbands.

"Alright Naruto, please perform a Kawarimi with anything in this room." Iruka quickly regretted phrasing it that way as Naruto formed a seal and was replaced with the unknown chuunin's hat, followed by a loud thud from Iruka's left as the man lost his balance and fell over with Naruto standing on his head. Iruka gave Naruto an even stare and the blonde simply scratched behind his head in his old habit while he smiled sheepishly. "This is no time for games Naruto." Iruka sighed. "Although I will give an extra point for switching with something that small." Naruto could only grin wider at that. Next was the henge, which Naruto performed perfectly, although once he looked like Iruka he struck a decidedly feminine pose and blew the real thing a kiss, resulting in the loss of his extra point for not taking his test seriously. That sobered Naruto up particularly quickly.

"Alright Naruto, this is the last jutsu. Please create at least two perfect clones using the Bunshin no Jutsu." Naruto formed the proper seal and shut his eyes. He was focused, he'd done this before, not consistently, but he knew he COULD do it, he had to do it just this once and then he would never have to deal with it again. It was with that thought that Naruto performed the technique. At the last second he realized with horror that he was using too much chakra, and quickly tried to correct it before the jutsu took effect. Naruto heard the distinct poof of the jutsu, but wasn't quite ready to see if he passed or not. Taking a deep breath, Naruto prepared to meet his fate and opened his eyes. To Naruto's left sat one of the worst clones he'd ever seen. It was basically a white blob with spiky hair and whiskers. Naruto sighed until he saw Iruka's face. The man was smiling. Not daring to hope, Naruto quickly spun his head to his right.

There were two perfect clones. He'd actually managed it.

"Congratulations Naruto, you've passed."

----------

It was after a fun filled night of congratulations and celebratory ramen that Naruto prepared to meet his team the next day. He was awake half the night wondering who his team would be. He had fervently hoped that he would be on the same team as Sakura. Those lips, those hips, that hair. She was perfect in Naruto's eyes. Although when he thought about it, he was ok with nearly all of the girls in his class. So long as at least one of the members of his team didn't have a penis he would be ok with it. Except for Sasuke of course, that was one person without a dick that Naruto would be glad to never see again.

Walking into the once again rowdy classroom, Naruto was surprised to note only one person had failed the graduation exam. Poor Daisuke, he always got motion sickness doing the Kawarimi. That would have messed him up since they had to do that first. Waving to Kiba and Hinata, he quickly found the pink haired girl of his dreams glaring at Ino from across the room. "Hey Sakura-chan, do you mind if-Urk!" He was quickly cut off as Sakura knocked him over to make it to a recently arrived Sasuke without as much as a glance at the trampled blonde. Defeated in his pursuit of true love (and a very nice rear) once again, Naruto made his way over to the seat next to Kiba.

"Hehe, so she got you again eh? Don't worry blondie, one of these days I'm sure she'll come around and maybe give you a kiss on the cheek out of pity." Kiba said with a shit-eating grin.

"Shut up mutt. If I wanted an intelligent opinion I would have asked my desk." returned Naruto. "So, any idea who you want on your team?"

"Not really. It would be cool if you me and Hinata were together, but the odds of that are pretty low. As long as I'm not stuck with some ass or an incompetent loser I should be fine."

The two boys spent a few minutes discussing who they would or wouldn't mind having on their teams until Iruka finally walked into the room, clipboard in hand, silencing everyone.

"First off, congratulations to all of you! You've made me proud." Having effectively lifted the spirits of his students, Iruka continued on. "Now, I will call out a team number, followed by the members of that team, and finally the Jounin-sensei assigned to that team. Team 1..." Naruto had mostly phased Iruka while still keeping an ear open for his name, but what he was more focused on were the Jounin who had entered the room during Iruka's speech. Each of them bore a leaf headband, and all but two women were wearing the standard shinobi uniform similar to Naruto's own, but with a vest signifying them as shinobi above genin rank. One of the women was wearing a brown trench coat over fishnet and a tight leather skirt, and it didn't take Naruto long to settle into an easy stare. "...maki Naruto" Naruto perked his head up catching his name in the nick of time as a senbon went whizzing by where his head had been a mere moment before. He was shocked to say the least, and even more so as it became apparent no one else had noticed except a few snickering Jounin. Seeing the voluptuous kunoichi he had just been ogling smile and wave at him, Naruto simply smiled sheepishly and turned to retrieve the...dango stick? Looking back to the woman with one eyebrow quirked and dango stick in hand, the purple-haired kunoichi just shrugged and smirked at him, making the universal gesture of slitting a throat with her left index finger. Suitably cowed, Naruto realized that in his moment of mortal peril, he'd missed who his teammates were.

Turning to Kiba to see if the boy had heard who his teammates were, Naruto was cut off by Iruka. "Those are your team assignments, those whose sensei's are already here, follow them out. The rest of you, stay here until your senseis arrive and call for you." As Iruka finished, Kiba stretched out his legs and rose out of his chair, snickering as turned to say his goodbyes to Naruto.

"Well, I guess I'll see you around Naruto, good luck with that team, should be a blast." At this point Naruto was just downright nervous. He was going to look like a fool in front of teammates that were apparently going to be a pain in the ass as it was if Kiba's insinuation was anything to go by.

"Kiba, wait." Naruto tried to grab the boy's attention, but he was already on his way to meet with his sensei. Watching the boy go, Naruto saw he was on a team with Hinata and Shino under the kunoichi with red eyes. Slowly teams began to file out as jounin showed up to take them away, and it wasn't long until the only person left Naruto could see in front of him was Sakura. As it clicked in his head that he would be on the same team as the object of affections, he let out a mental cheer, but soon his excitement was replaced by curiosity as to who the third member of his team would be. Turning to see who was seated behind him still, Naruto was appalled. The only person left was Sasuke.

His big chance to score points with Sakura, and he had to compete with that dickless ladies-boy that she couldn't keep her eyes off of. Fate was so not fair. Naruto's hatred of fate would continue for a quite so time as the seconds turned into minutes, and the minutes crawled into hours. "Great." he began to mumble. "Not only is my team gonna be a major pain, but our sensei apparently forgot he was supposed to be teaching us." Giving up on just waiting around like a chump, Naruto made his way to the blackboard, gaining Sakura's attention from her daydream of raising Sasuke's children. There would have been three. Two boys with Sasuke's good looks and black hair, and a girl with her pink hair, but Sasuke's forehead.

"What are you doing Naruto?" Naruto was currently standing on a chair as he set an eraser in the top of the sliding door to the classroom. "You shouldn't pull pranks on our new sensei Naruto, you better not get him mad at us." Said Sakura, though internally she was cheering the blonde on. It served the jerk right for making them wait around so long. Satisfied that his trap was well in place. Naruto stood back to admire his handiwork, Sasuke chose this moment to finally acknowledge that Naruto was even in the room.

"Our sensei's an elite jounin, idiot. He's not going to fall for something as simple as that." Naruto just smirked. No sooner had Sasuke finished, a man wearing the standard Konoha shinobi uniform stepped through the door. His only distinguishing features were his strange grey hair, and the fact that any other distinguishing features aside from a single eye were covered by a mask and his headband. The man stared at them all lazily as the eraser dropped down onto his head, releasing a cloud of chalk.

Silence reined for a moment, and just as the man seemed about to speak, a tell-tale splash signified that the second stage of Naruto's trap had just splashed the man's silver hair with dye in a distinct shade of lavender. Silence covered the room once again, and Naruto was struggling as hard as he could to keep from bursting into full-blown hysterics when the man finally spoke.

"Team seven I assume. I'm Hatake Kakashi, your jounin-sensei. Meet me on the roof in five minutes, and by the way..." The jounin took a moment to pause for dramatic effect and began to walk back out the door before turning his head to look back at his new students. "I hope you're good, because I hate you." The man's eye curved into what the three students could feel was an evil smile and began to shiver as Kakashi poofed away in the trademark exit of most high-level ninja.

Trying to make sense of whether he should be laughing his ass off or shivering in fear, Naruto shook his head and gave his two frightened teammates a half-hearted laugh. Sakura managed to shake off her fear at this and sent Naruto a death glare which brought back his shivers full force. "Great job Naruto, you probably just got us killed." Sasuke simply wondered what he could possibly learn from someone who fell for something that simple.

At the very least, thought Naruto as he began to make his way towards the roof, he wouldn't be bored for a while.

* * *

**A/N**

There's chapter two. Bet you thought I was just another one of those one-trick ponies eh? So ha!

I wouldn't complain if someone offered to do beta-reading for this story. It wouldn't be hard to keep up with given my feeble work ethic, and I'm aware my writing can be a little stale, so some feedback would be cool.

I'm hoping this will pick up soon, I just wanted to rush into the genin days since I didn't want to be one of those authors who write 15 chapters before they even graduate.

And Happy Halloween!


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